Remembering to Smile on Cloudy Days

Aching, Tired, and Weak are three words to sum up my day. I must have slept at an awkward angle last night because today is rough!. I guess there will always be good and bad days, but severe back pain makes for a pretty bad day. The one thing I find with the pain from scoliosis is that it has a direct influence on my emotions. Therefore, not only is my body screaming but my mind as well. I feel like crawling into a little ball and yelling at the world to leave me alone.... Ah yes I do know this will pass and I do look forward to my cheery outlook on life. However, momentarily it is hard to see through this veil of pain. 

 On a similar note I really have to express how this Blog has been a struggle for me. I am an introvert at heart. I revel in my alone time, seek out the quiet spots, and keep friendships very few. I find when any pain or weakness sneaks into my life my first reaction is to hide away. It took a lot of strength to not delete this blog all together due to feeling too exposed. However, I honestly believe that it will be a source of knowledge for other young girls or boys going through scoliosis spinal surgery and for that reason I will let my emotions go through their roller coaster ride without making rash decisions.

I was a bit shocked to find that even 3 1/2 months post operation there are days when the weakness and tiredness from my back becomes overwhelming. The majority of my days  I feel like I could climb Mt. Everest; however, then there are days where getting out of bed is a struggle. I do pray that over the course of time these brutal days will begin to become obsolete. <3

3 Months Post Op

                                                   

Here I am 3 months post operation. Scar is looking lovely and almost all feeling has returned to my hips and lower back. It has been a tough journey, but one that I do not regret taking. I feel stronger and taller, which has made my quality of life significantly better. I am living basically pain free and could not be happier. I have successfully returned to a 5 days a week gym routine consisting of cardio and weight lifting. There is a few restrictions regarding lifting weights over my head or placing weights on my shoulders but overall my workouts are still intense. I went for my first run yesterday. It was a very odd feeling as I could feel the rods in my back moving up and down ( or at least that's how it felt). However, there was no pain and I felt like my stride was more even then prior to surgery. 

Words of Advice 

1/ Patience - you will get better, you will be stronger. Healing takes time

2/ Bloating can last up to a year - even three months post op there are days when food does not sit right. My digestive system is still a Little wacky. Psylium husk has been the miracle solution for me. It is a natural product you can get t health food stores which aids in digestion and bowel functions. BUT - do not and I repeat do not ... Take to much ... Then it works backwards and can back you up :) one teaspoon a day is plenty. 

3/ Bending and twisting till is impossible. I have learn to bend my leg at a weird angle to tie my shoes. Honestly, the best thing I did was buy slip on shoes. They are still my best friend. 

4/ Weird body behaviors - more acne, random twitching of the limbs, nerves sending pulses of pain. All of these may happen over the course of your recover. My skin flared up as if I was in high school after getting off the medications. I am assuming it was the drugs leaving my body. My legs will occasionally twitch and send little nerve tingles up my body. My doctor assured me this is just nerves healing themselves and reconnecting. 

5/ Surround yourself with positive people who are honestly there to love and support you - you will amaze yourself :)